Well-ness Words:  Mind, Body & Soul

1 Kings 3:16-28 NRSVUE

24 So the king said, “Bring me a sword,” and they brought a sword before the king. 25 The king said, “Divide the living boy in two; then give half to the one and half to the other.” 26 But the woman whose son was alive said to the king, because compassion for her son burned within her, “Please, my lord, give her the living boy; certainly do not kill him!” The other said, “It shall be neither mine nor yours; divide it.” 27 Then the king responded, “Give her the living boy; do not kill him.  She is his mother.” 28 All Israel heard of the judgment that the king had rendered, and they stood in awe of the king because they perceived that the wisdom of God was in him to execute justice.

My sister and I enacted this passage for nearly every Mother’s Day under the direction of our mom, a choir and play director.  As the oldest child, I had many responsibilities, including watching over and caring for my younger siblings, and it was expected of me to make sound and wise decisions for them to abide by.  My sister, the second child, was quieter and detail-oriented when it came to household chores.  She preferred not to be involved in sibling rivalry.  She has been faithful to this until this day.  Hence, I always played the “bad mother” role and my sister the “good mother,” as these mothers were frequently labeled to teach a lesson (my brother played the role of King Solomon).

The ultimate goal of the play was to share a lesson of true motherly love and sacrifice for Mother’s Day, a day in which mothers are honored for their sacrificial love for their children.

Although I believe this kind of love to be true, I always felt that something was lacking, an  underlying message overlooked, and the reality that no matter what makes a mother a mother, not one mother is the same, and not all mothers have the same past upbringing or have the same life experiences, traumas, and triggers, grief or resentments.  And then, all children may see and perceive their mothers differently than how mothers see themselves. However, there is one thing that every mother needs, craves, and desires from the moment a child is born and throughout their children lives: wisdom, the gift of listening, and trust in God’s infinite wisdom.

In this passage, there was a king named Solomon who was considered and known by all as filled with wisdom, not any wisdom, God’s wisdom: “28 All Israel heard of the judgment that the king had rendered, and they stood in awe of the king because they perceived that the wisdom of God was in him to execute justice.”

But with wisdom comes the gift of listening. King Solomon listened to both sides of the story of these two women; one was very detailed (which had me thinking how is it that she knew that the other got up at midnight to exchange the babies), and the other was succinct and poignant, “ 22  But the other woman said, ‘No, the living son is mine, and the dead son is yours”  This back-and-forth argument went on at least two more times before King Solomon asked for a sword to split the infant in half so that each may have a piece of the child. The true child’s mother called for the sparing of the child;s life, even if it meant giving the child up. 

I recall the day I saw my daughter off to college life. I was concerned about her safety, getting enough rest and eating well, her relationships with God and roommates, and who would care for her if she ever got sick. I knew she would make her own decisions and wondered if she would ever call on God or me for advice and what I would say if she did. I prayed to God for wisdom and the gift of listening without judgment if she did something I wouldn’t agree with. I did not want to have disagreements while being so far apart, although I would make those five hours seem like one if we ever needed to talk, hold each other, and be with each other.

It was four long years, and I am not going to lie; in those four years, life happened, from a horrible car accident to heartbreaks. What kept me sane was the assurance and daily reassurance from God that she was not alone in this journey. She had God and me and my constant prayers for wisdom and the gift of listening if she needed me.

When we let go of our children, no matter their age or where they are geographically, and leave them in God’s hands, it feels like a huge sacrifice in that if we could, we would keep half of the child at home with us and watch the other half go into the world to experience life on their own.  God reminds us that our children are a borrowed gift from God and that where our responsibility as a mother seems to end, God will always take it from where we left off.

I pray for peace and comfort for all whose mothers have gone before us on this day. For mothers who grieve the loss of their children, I pray for strength and that you may look to those who yearn for a motherly figure and offer them your love. To the single mothers, you are enough. To the women caring for the children of others, you are an unsung hero!  To all mothers, have a blessed Mother’s Day!

In Christ,
Pastor Iraida